With Friends Like These

We all know "that guy" or "that girl". The one who is always talking about people behind their back.

Did you seriously think "that person" was really your friend?

I have learned a lot about some really nice people who genuinely care about others, and they don't deserve this type of behavior.

Hallmarks of a real friend?

From Solotopia.com (here's a partial list):

Rules of Friendship

• Remain equally loyal in good & bad times.
• Respect the person, not the position, title, or assets.
• Always do what you say you will do.
• Never talk bad about a friend to others.
• Keep their secrets a secret. No exceptions!
• Always be honest, but never critical.
• Help without expecting a return favor, but do not do it unconsciously.
• Take a stand in your friendships. Be who you are.
• Do not allow your friends to persuade you to do things that you know are not in your best interest.
• Do not criticize, critique, or condemn your friends.

There are similar lists at many websites, and all of them are centered around just plain decent behavior.

It is rather interesting that this guy violates pretty much everything on this list. 

Sometimes to their face, but often behind their back, he talks about his "friends". 

He didn't just complain to me, I had a front row seat to witness him talking disrespectfully about his "friends" to other people (supposedly also "friends").

I have no doubts that many of them heard the same type of "trash talk" about me and my family, since some of his negative comments about us were made in front of me.

One of the triggers that would result in his outbursts was when a person didn't immediately gratify his wishes (by answering a phone call or text right away, or accepting an invitation for a meal when he wanted it, or inviting him to an event they were attending).

Another trigger was his friends "bothering" him when he didn't want their attention (calling out of the blue, stopping by, inviting him to events he didn't like, or wanting support if they were having difficulties).

Trust me, I saw the back end of all these interactions, and if you think about conversations with him, you will realize that you've heard him talk the same way about others to you.

Did you really think you were immune?